The Price I Paid

You see me laughing in such a way, as if life has been like a pillow for me.
And I fool you with my charm like I don't feel my bones trying to tear their way out of me.
You see my smile, my pose, my beauty, and you envy me based on what you see!
If only you knew the price I paid, trust me, you wouldn't dare want to be like me.
You see me shining so bright, like diamonds can't even compete with me.
I keep my head high and pretend I can't feel the daggers slowly killing me.
It's all a lie! I'm made of plastic. No I'm not what you think.
I'm weak, I'm torn. And I'm ashamed of the scars I don't let anyone see.
"Why?" you ask. "They made you strong." But that's not what I wanted to be!
Why couldn't I just live a normal life? And make reckless choices like others did
Why do I have to walk on eggshells? And hold on to a rope that's frayed to its core?
Why couldn't I just live a normal life? Just like normal people would?